Über die Erschaffung der Welt / About the creation of the world (Good Omens)
Archbishop James Usher (1580-1656) published Annales Veteris et Novi Testamenti in 1654, which suggested that the Heaven and the Earth were created in 4004 BC. One of his aides took the calculation further, and was able to announce triumphantly that the Earth was created on Sunday the 21st of October, 4004 BC, at exactly 9.00 a.m., because God liked to get work done early in the morning while he was feeling fresh. This too was incorrect. By almost a quarter of an hour.
This proves two things:
First, that God moves in extremely mysterious, not to say, circuitous ways. God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of the other players (ie., everybody) to being involved in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.
Secondly, the Earth's a Libra.
Über Chaos und Ordnung / About chaos and order (Interesting Times)
According to the philosopher Ly Tin Wheedle, chaos is found in greatest abundance wherever order is being sought. It always defeats order, because it is better organised.
Über das Glück / About luck (Interesting Times)
"Luck is my middle name," said Rincewind, indistinctly. "Mind you, my first name is Bad."
Über Patriotismus / About patriotism (Interesting Times)
His legs were blue from the cold and his nose was red from the wind, giving him overall quite a patriotic look if you were from the right country.
Über Australien / About Australia (The Last Continent)
They say the heat and the flies here can drive a man insane. But you don't have to believe that, and nor does that bright mauve elephant that just cycled past.
Und zum Abschluss noch ein deutsches Zitat (Voll im Bilde)
Es heißt, alle Straßen führen nach Ankh-Morpork, der größten Stadt auf der Scheibenwelt. Nun, man erzählt sich zumindest, daß es heißt, alle Straßen führten nach Ankh-Morpork. Es stimmt nicht. Alle Straßen führen von Ankh-Morpork fort, doch ab und zu gehen manche Leute in die falsche Richtung.
Zurück zur Humor-Seite
Back to the humor page